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Some people don't think saying these things mean anything...it's not that serious... They assume once you say it and say sorry bygones will be bygones....but no! Your partner will always remember your words. Don't let any amount of see-finish make you start saying these yamayama things and if you already do, please stop!
INSULTS
...Like "goat", "idiot"," mumu", "fool" ....mba nu. Don't do that. For some people calling someone "goat" is not a big deal....you might have done it growing up with your siblings or your close friends but please leave it there. That is abuse...e nor good.
SHUT UP
Shey your spouse/partner is a ta-ta? Are you in a relationship with a toddler? You shouldn't tell him/her to shut up. Communication is very vital in a relationship and if you get it wrong o tan niyen. Give your babe/bobo opportunity to speak and when they have aired their opinion you can talk your own. Don't shut them up. It only builds resentment.
WHATEVER
Ehn? Woreva? Please don't say that. It is dismissing whatever the other person is saying, no one likes to be dismissed like that. It is RUDE! You should not be rude in your relationship. If you like what you are building, then build it well.
IT'S OVER
Don't say it unless you really want it to be over. Not every small quarrel over who ate the last meat in the pot should warrant an "Its Over". If you keep saying this 2 things will happen: 1. Your partner/spouse will become very insecure in the relationship because they don't know if you're coming or going. 2. They will never take you seriously and begin to look elsewhere. Don't throw "It's Over" around.
COMPARISON
"Look at so and so", "why can't we buy a car like Mr and Mrs B", "Why can't you be romantic like Mr Somebody." Don't do it. Comparisons in that manner are not healthy. It would make your significant other think you prefer whom they are being compared with. It's never a nice feeling. It can mess with their self esteem.
NOTHING
You know something is worrying you but when your partner asks you say "nothing" and then keep sulking. This will only push them away unless you have someone who is patient enough to coax you out of that mood. But once he/she knows that is your usual manner of saying "nothing" when truly there is something, they will stop asking. You can say "I'm not ready to talk now, maybe later".
I hope these gems help you build better relationships :)
no insults, i'm not into that at all.
ReplyDeletehopefully no shut-ups, though that is possible, as in play-argument.
used to say whatever a lot, my ex didn't like that, but it was an accurate representation of my true self and true attitude - whatever - and we broke up because his passion and my whatever were not gelling. a week ago i ran into a guy in a t-shirt that read :
what
ever
of course i gave him a compliment. i like laid-back everything, it's like a religion for me.
summary: just be yourself.
Am no ashamed of myself I really need more relationship advices before I loose my husband I say all the unthinkable to him
ReplyDeleteDefinitely no insults no matter what. I have to confess I do say "whatever" and "nothing" a lot, that's just me, will probably never stop.
ReplyDeleteLady G
www.gabychronicles.blogspot.com
XOXO
I am a working class guy. That use of whatever passes me off so my girl distinguishes n says worefa. That means she is joking. Whatever means she is serious n that ticks me off
Deletevery helpful tips sisi!!im definitely not one to say nothing because i must talk but im guilty of whatever sometimes!!Hope this helps a lot of people,,
ReplyDeletewww.cheecheelive.com
Yeah I agree with u dear "Sisi Yemmie, there are some things we do and we think on a normal mood it's right because you grew up with it or it partially part of you but some partners might keep quiet just to stay at peace. Recently We had so many testimonies after our relationship series on #adamandeve @harvesters, people discovery little things that destroy relationships so people don't know those little bad habit / attitude Can actually cause ur relationship to crumble. If you don't know you guys can talk about it and disciple yourself, I believe for a relationship to be successful you need to work towards it, you cannot do it alone u need God to also help you out. Thanks
ReplyDeleteI think I may need to stop the 'nothing' craze. I have experienced it a few times from the other end and I know how annoying this can be. I meeeeeean, if I have to start begging an adult to tell me what's wrong, ah! I get this gist now. It is time to 'shhaaaange'.
ReplyDeleteThanks for this post Sisi Yemmie.
good job sweetie! aside from the topic...I fell in love with your blog when I came across your vides:-) omg they reminded me so much of when I was birthing my babies and taking care of them alone while bobo was working far away from us. brought back many beautiful memories. keep up the good work dear. wishing you all the best
ReplyDeleteThese are some really goood tips. Although im not in a relationship and tend to use nothing a lot simply because its hard for me to express myself. I know it puts a strain between you and the other person but how the other person feel. Thats the part im trying to understand. Everyone's different
ReplyDeleteI'm guilty of 'whatever' and 'nothing ' This will surely help,thanks for the tips.
ReplyDeletelol.....so funny nd educative
ReplyDeleteVery true. I especially agree with the no comparison part
ReplyDeleteThis is so educative. Your words can mar or make your relationship.
ReplyDeletePlease click here to visit my blog
that "nothing" is my own oooo. will work on it. thanks.
ReplyDeleteit's ok, i ve learnt. Yemisi, longest time ooo, how's Fumi, i know you cant remember me, we went to school together(Fieldcrest in DSC ). Hope you are good.
ReplyDeleteWonderful and useful post! It's very important to know it because with these words you can hurt your lover! And you should know more about love, that's why read https://kovla.com/blog/15-most-interesting-facts-about-love-of-all-times/ . In this post you will find many important and funny facts) Enjoy!)
ReplyDeletei love this so much, it will really help me control the way i often say ITS OVER to my man ,,,,thanks and pls help us share more related issues on this
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