Oh yes! Been there so I can tell the story-pregnancy was a very trying time for me emotionally and physically which is one of the reasons I didn't even want to show it on my blog. I felt like my body was not mine, messing anyhow and wondering how my nose and feet expanded beyond their capacities. On one of those days when I was feeling up to it, I managed to pack powder on my face, rub my rubywoo lipstick on my swollen lips and filmed this video you're about to watch. YES, you WILL watch it! LOL. Here are 5 things you should not ask/tell a pregnant Nigerian woman:
1. Are you pregnant? Belle nor dey hide-if the person doesn't come out to say it to you it is better not to ask. You really don't know their situation. Wait for them to tell you or when it is very obvious. It's not every time people don't talk about their pregnancy because of winches-sometimes they just don't want to.
2. You are so big/fat: It comes with the territory and the last thing a pregnant woman wants to hear from you is that she's fat. Pregnancy affects women emotionally, so give us a break. Don't be insensitive.
3. Yor nose is so huge: I got this one a lot-infact that was one of the first signs of pregnancy. The nose just kept getting bigger and bigger and people would not stop telling me-you think i did not see my face in the mirror before I left my house?
4. When is your due date? Nigerian women don't play like that. Due date ke? If you are not besties with a Nigerian woman, it is best to refrain from asking this question. It's a little bit intrusive. If she no tell you, nor take offence.
5. Are you having a boy/girl? People nor dey ask this question-we are not in oyinbo man land. In Nigeria this question is not normal and if you ask they might give you the kind of answer you don't like. If the answer you get is "We have not checked if it's a boy or girl" take that as a cue that it's not your business!
Lol!! Naija people sa! Except I am really close to a pregnant woman, I DO NOT ask any questions.
ReplyDeleteLOL!
ReplyDeleteBerry Dakara Blog
Let me give you a shocker Sisi Yemmie,they ask "what name are you giving the baby"?? Like seriously? I think that's the most private thing a pregnant woman wants to keep. Not in Naija though
ReplyDeleteI learnt some of this the hard way! Honestly didn't know asking the due date or sex of the child was a taboo until I got shot down a few times! I personally didn't see the big deal and a lot of people still asked me anyway so I guess it really depends on the person :)
ReplyDeleteThere's honestly nothing wrong with asking. I don't agree that it's offensive to ask for the due date and sex, those are very natural questions. We're just very superstitious in Africa and think everything is a taboo. I answered anyone who dared asked me when baby was due and his sex. My God is more powerful than any witch, no?
DeleteCorrect
DeleteSome questions are better left un-asked. How will you ask a pregnant woman her due date? That should be her and her husband's business.
ReplyDeleteThis cracked me up big time...sis yemmie ooooo. Nigerians can ask jamb question eehn
ReplyDeleteWell I agree with you because we are Africans. But here in the UK, there's nothing to hide about all of ds questions. Ur colleagues at work sef will ask to touch ur belly. Ask ur due date, ask d gender, throw themed baby shower for u according to d gender. But in naija..D fear of winches will not allow u try such. It is well!
ReplyDeleteMy SIL said...Wo bo se ri,o ti e fine mo(look at you,you are no longer fine)
ReplyDeleteI actually retaliated and told her worse when she got preggy.
Do me,i does you,God no go vex ke.
Frankly tho, pregnancy no 2, I'll have 'nice' comebacks for any nonsense statement.
DeleteThe preggie journey no easy lol @ packing powder on your face
ReplyDeleteI hate those negative comments from people......mtcheeeew !
Please should learn to reserve the negative comments till later, infact swallow it as a bitter pill...
For me I tell my friend my baby name while pregnant that 's Meeee ! I address the baby in the my tummy with his name, but due date i will tell you how far I have gone in weeks.
lol, too funny.
ReplyDeleteThe annoying one for me is usually "you have put on so much weight'. With my first child it was really annoying hearing people say that. By 2nd baby I was rolling with the punches and learnt how to get back in sharp sharp after baby dropped. It comes with the territory and doesn't bother me any more because I know I can go back to the way I looked pre pregnancy with some work.
Pregnancy time...hmm! there are days u feel good, other days u look messed up like the whole thing should just end fast. I honestly wish I could do the surrogate thingy to help for a token though, but the feelings I get, the imbalance of hormones, change in taste bud, loss of appetite sometimes, always salivating, the heartburn I get after almost every meal and the worst part, not being able to drink water. My only consolation was garri water for almost 6 months. Not easy at all. But atlas, when d baby comes out, d joy of seeing this bundle makes me forget the discomfort. What an experience...motherhood!
ReplyDeletewow..I love that..It's common with a lot of women..nd that garri water, mehhnn it cools one down, especially when its cold. Also my mother was always salivating when she had her 2nd child like kilode(what happened) lol
DeleteLol please how do you forget the discomfort. .... I had a not so easy pregnancy and now even though I love my child more than anything in the world, I've decided I will not be having another baby haha.
DeleteI think the nose statement would be my least favorite. I have a feeling I'd be one of those who'd record the nose-enlargemnt symptom...and no, i wouldn't need nobody to remind me.
ReplyDeleteI totally get what you mean by feeling like you're not in your own body. I'm still feeling it one year after delivery. Pregnancy made me a recluse. I didn't want to go anywhere I could bump into someone I know cos their reactions would always upset me.
ReplyDelete1,2,3 I agree.
ReplyDeleteGosh some people are so insensitive. Trimester 3 was PAINFUL!!! I couldn't understand how ugly I kept getting. So much for the famed pregnancy glow which left me. Now 4months pp, I am truly glowing and I can share those pictures.
'What sex are u having? When are u due?'
Pretty regular questions to me. We don't have to be super close to ask/be asked. Most times, I even said it in casual convos. Matter of fact, I LOVED being asked. So, different strokes mama. If you no answer me tho, I wouldn't mind tho that is yet to happen.
Interestingly, I met this lady in aerobics class today and as we chatted, I asked her if she was 'done' (she already had a B and G) and she graciously answered me and with even more info. Same way in ANC, we could discus how far we had progressed and what we were having even tho we were strangers who were just pregnant at the same time.
All I know is people BE SENSITIVE around a pregnant woman.
If tz not downright positive and absolutely flattering, SHOVE IT
There are some questions left un-asked. like me when I was pregnant for my first, ask me anything I go dey look you, naw be you go help me carry the belle or follow me push. Ask me for the sex of the child: my response, pikin close leg so doctor naw see.
ReplyDeleteNice post, check my blog for pregnancy myths too.http://tytysmusings.blogspot.com/
lolz.....
ReplyDeleteshebi na when i get belle i go know all these things na
THIS IS NO RANDOM THOUGHT
Wow!!!! Lesson learnt. Hope to experience it someday.
ReplyDeleteHahaha, u're right
ReplyDeleteHi, i'm a first timer here, and I love this post. I just transitioned from Naija to yankee and I remember when I got pregnant, my husband's friend asked me how far gone am I? I was a bit taken aback but I responded backdating my answer, meanwhile I didn't know my husband already told him the real answer. So my husband later told me I didn't need to lie cos this is yankee, people don't hide stuff about babies, I'm like duh! I'm not everyone. Another man from church kept on asking us the gender of the baby every Sunday when it wasn't yet time for us to check, he eventually told us we will be having a boy, wetin concern am?
ReplyDeleteThey ask alot of due date questions, sex questions and baby name questions here in yankee and me still wonder what their business is.
I remember asking a fellow preggy friend who was ahead of me what the gender of her baby was, her answer - when they checked, baby was crossed-legged so they asked them to come back' 😅 I immediately knew she didn't wanna tell me and I blamed myself for asking, though I thought it's cos we're friends and we're both preggy, she'd tell me, but mehn, I got the clue from that her answer and kept mute until she told me her self when it was close to her due date what she was having.
About nose, I got a fair share of that starting from my 2ND trimester as well. For me, I am a makeup artist and I do You tube videos, at that point, I knew my nose and lips had ganged up against me 😁making my face look different. No mater the "nose contouring" I did, they never work, and of course, over contouring the nose will look too fake. Even makeup products separate on my face sef, foundation will go one direction, powder will turn the other way, 😂. Soooooooo soooooooo funny to me.
You did not talk about the small black moles that appear on the face and the neck coupled with dark neck too including itching tummy which could give stretch marks ? 😁
Though Coconut oil and Olive oil helped me combat all of them.
Over all, it's a great experience and a blessing, sometimes I tell myself I don't care whatever my face goes through, it's all for a good cause and I am grateful to God.
Thank you for sharing.
You can check out my puffy preggy face in come of my You Tube videos on http://www.youtube.com/c/swanbeautyplace/
Can you ask Nigerians questions about the baby after its born lol? Or is that taboo too?
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing this BTW!
ReplyDeleteHey……I really admit that pregnancy symptoms is joyous and challenging both at the same time for any women.
ReplyDeletehi there, I am sooo excited but worried so I am south African right and got pregnant by a Nigerian guy! its still early and all I do is dream of him and his family and do I crave jollof rice and pepper stew with a side of coleslaw the way he likes it? I am like ok what must happen now? to top it of he is angry with me???? but really?
ReplyDelete