HUMMER- I'M A STYLIST IN BED!!!! O_o

 I cannot remember how many times I have almost been killed just by opening my email. People can be killed in more ways than one. Before, Sisi used to kpeme once in two weeks, from all those Chain emails I used to get. You know dem na...."forward to at least 20 people if not you will have bad news by tomorrow morning". Odiegwu! When i just started using technology in the early 2000, I used to be soooo scared when I read those messages ehn, my past mumu self will now be rigorously searching for emails addresses to forward to! But now I don wise....once I see FWD: in front of message, na delete kia kia! So na me Bill Gates love pass for this world soootaay he wan put me in his will if I fwd the message to 100 people abi??? I carry yansh for una!

Any how sha since I join the Association of BlackBerry Babes (Gbobgbo Bigs tinz) I have been getting some kain FWD messages ehn....some are cute: "Describe me in one word, and send it back to me! send this to all your friends and see what they think about YOU too!"... Some na FWD or DIE, sending Pastorly messages kon add jara threat at the end..."If u love Jesus pass it on or else your prayers will not be answered! But there are some on another level that I just have to GISTDOTCOM about dem. Shooooooo! Wetin pesin eye no go see these days? Anybody waiting for me to seriously update my status with the messages below are simply sleeping on Okada!

Brethren, see me see trouble, I dey hol-my-side wey pesin just send me this message:

1) "Now its time 4d girls to get pretty wild while confusing the guys....not snitchin bitches(guess im already a snitch!)

HONDA.  I'm a bisexual3-|
CAMRY.  Ma man is borin in bed :(
RANGE ROVER.  I easily get wet :$
VOLVO.  I hate sex X_X
BENTLEY. Ma man fucks hard <3
ROLLS ROYCE. I luv sex (*)
INFINITY. I'm a fuckin lesbo :D
CARDILAC. I luv threesome :*
MERCEDES. I can go countless rounds a day (y)
HUMMER.  I'm a stylist in bed \=D/
MOTOR CYCLE.  I'm borin in bed:|

2) Put ur month as ur status.    Now its time 4d gurls 2get pretty wild while confusin d guys...
 JANUARY = SLUT
FEBRUARY = ATTITUDE. 
MARCH = FLIRTATIOUS. 
APRIL = FIERY. 
MAY = PORNSTARS. 
JUNE = THE BEST .
JULY = HOTTIE. 
AUGUST = THUG.
SEPTEMBER = LOVER. 
OCTOBER -PERFECT. 
NOVEMBER = PASSIONATE. 
DECEMBER = FREAK IN BED.

3) Ladies lets have a little fun with the status and make the guys really confused because they hate it when women start putting similar status on and they have no idea what were talking about.
The idea is you put how many cms depending on your mood:
12cm = completely crazy
13cm = Sleepy
14cm = bored at home or at work
15cm = Party time
16cm = missing my ex
17cm = really happy
18cm = studying or working
19cm = I'm stupidly in love
20cm = Sexually satisfied
21cm = in love with the wrong man
22cm = with my boyfriend but in love with somebody else
23cm = want sex
24cm = really happy with my love

Bia! So they think i don't know the plan ehn? I will now say im BENTLEY so that all these girls that are 14cm and are MARCH, JANUARY and ROLLS ROYCE  will now go and kolobi my Bobo for corner joint?! Mbanu! I am not 12cm!!! Abeg make una park well! These days wey babe eye dey chook! Girls are not smiling oh!

Now share this my post on twitter and facebook within 10 minutes or else ...
 1 minute- you are safe and will have good fortune!
3-5 minutes- Your apple will taste like agbalumo
7-9 minutes craw-craw go cover your whole face and yansh!!!
 10 minutes and over- you will dream of me every night till you SHARE!

PS. Keep the FWD messages coming....some make my day!